First Post of the Year

What excites you most about a New Year? You finally getting the car you always wanted? Working out and eating better to become the better you? Or maybe cuddling up next to the people you love for a final celebration to top off the year? These are all assumptions I would have to start a year of new opportunities, not curled up with a snot rag up your nose because you contracted one of the world’s most annoying and persistent household illnesses. Ah, yes. The good old Corona chick is here.

It’s probably clear how I feel about her, especially around this time of year. I have tried EVERYTHING to not get sick again (especially not with this b*tch). Is it just me but when we try to prevent something, it ends up happening any damn way, maybe even worse? Well, I live that every day and still I am a sucker to making no change at all.

Being sick as an adult is not as fun as it was when we were kids. Staying home, watching cartoons, drinking alphabet soup in bed while your parent(s) give you everything you want and need all day. We still have to go to work to pay them bills, take care of the family, and more!

So, starting a New Year sick is not on the list of anyone’s New Year’s Resolution, let alone mine.

Anyways, back to the thought of a New Year! Exciting right? High hopes to see everyone around you finally take you seriously as you tell them, “This year, I’m finally gonna work on myself!” Well, what are we going to do to change? I know, this is kinda starting to sound like an intervention, but I urge you, please self-reflect.

What you think now knowing what you know from the year prior, do you gotta “figure some sh*t out"?

This is mostly just a self reflection for myself because I am sick and tired of just saying, “Uh, hey Stacs, could you uh, maybe…takebettercareofyourselfsoyoudon’tdieearly?”

“Thank youuu.”

I decided since I created this website and blog, I was going to better myself all around the board, even in my stubborn, procrastinatin’, eating junk food, no water drinking era.

No, we may not all be the same, maybe you have it together and started last year on a better me journey and you’re doing fine now. I honestly lovvve that for you! (No, seriously)

But to be real, that was not me 10,5,2, even a year ago.

So what’s the formula? Why am I sucking at every progressive goal I set? That question can be answered based on what you want to improve and who you are as a planner. Are you a goal setter who just wants to get to it? Are you a planner that might not always have the time and dates aligned with reality? Or are you like me where the thought of having to write everything down in a book before you have to do it scares you?

Writing this is scary enough for me to think about doing all the time, but I want to commit to it because I want to reach out to you cool, lovely people. So why not add this into my new year’s resolution as something that will not only give me a place to vent- I mean talk about the most common thoughts and problems in life, but to hopefully entertain you all.

Planning?

Starting with the planning. I am aware that some things on the list may be a little too far into the future. Unless you have, like close to $1,000,000 saved up as a single person working a normal 9-5 job, you are not going to be able to get that house you wanted for two years now (yet). You gotta think a bit smaller. What can I get done within the day? Laundry, cleaning, cooking dinner, walking the dog, anything that would make you say, “I did it” after you’re finished. Then once you get the hang of turning your daily chores into something manageable, start planning the bigger things like payments, bills, loans, monthly expenses, etcetera. As long as you understand where to place events on your schedule.

Use the apps on your phone and devices to write down notes, set alarms, write dates in the calendar, anything that will make planning a breeze for you.

All in all, take it one step at a time, love. It’s better that way.

Get Ready…

Think of the goal you have as why do I want to do something? what is the deadline? If not, do I want to make a deadline to meet the goal? Remember, deadlines aren’t just for you to panic about, they’re also something that gives you an ultimatum. You want to get out of your parents house and live on your own. Boom, that’s something you’re passionate about doing. The what should always be in the front and back of your mind when you’re doing something.

When I think about getting ready for something, I think about that person at the start line of the race doing their arm and leg stretches then get close to the ground with their hiney in the air about to dart to the finish line. They don’t think about, “Wait, did I wear the right shoes today” or “Wait, did I wear my lucky underwear today?”

Nope… well, I don’t know about that last one. But they’re just looking down that track, pacing themselves so they don’t burn out and still win the race.

That’s the importance of getting ready. Making sure that you can be prepared for that finish line moment.

Procrastination is a biotch, and believe me, I should know (I finish essays and submit them at 11:59 exactly, more than once)

Getting past that hurdle of “eh, I don’t wanna right now” is the first level of progress. I know it’s hard, but rewarding.

Don’t think about it, just GO!

It’s a habit that I have and maybe you have too that we tend to overthink things before we do it. As the wise Shia Labouff said," “Just DO IT!”

Seems simple enough, right? Not for me at first.

See, I tend to think about all the things that could go wrong before I even start. But I realize, that’s one of the things hindering my progress (that and my love for cookies and cake).

The more we think about how much we cant do something, we psych ourselves into failing our goal.

I believe it’s better to live life rather than just waking up every day to just exist. That’s no life I wanna live (and I doubt you do either)

The main reason we don’t feel motivated to do something is a level of comfort we feel in our non changing situation. It may not be comfortable, but we have accepted that it is our normal way of living, so we become complacent.

I know, harsh word for a blog about just achieving better. But I had to hear it one too many times to hear it any more times after this. It’s a word that clearly explains the actions we may do daily without even realizing it.

We tend to forget why we do things in the first place and just do them because we’ve been doing them for so long without thinking. Do you think about how to brush your teeth everyday or how to dress yourself to go out? No. Those are automatically wired in our brain since they were taught to us. We feel comfortable doing these things because we tell our selves it’s good for us.

But maybe we are too comfortable in just existing.

Wow, that was pretty deep.

I would say it’s a pretty big crisis today all around the world. We don’t desire change unless our circumstances are so uncomfortable, it’s unbearable. Why does it have to get that bad?

As Psychology today puts it, “The Comfort Crisis is all about pushing yourself to reach your full potential, to become the person you want to be. Setting goals and challenges for yourself is a form of traction, an action that moves us toward what we want.(1)

Couldn’t’ve said it better myself.

Honestly guys, I’m tired of older generations telling us we’re lazy and can’t do things for ourselves. We grew up with discipline from our parents just the same (well, almost all of us) It’s not about when you’re born that makes you more responsible of your own decisions. We’ve all had our moments.

What’s the outcome?

In all honesty, hon, that’s up to you. We all want the results of our favorite celebrity or famous social media star/ influencer. But thinking realistically may be what saves us the heartaches of expecting too much too quickly. Some results may take time to acheive, but some just don’t come out exactly the same and that’s okay! Being yourself and making any routine or result your own is what should make you satisfied in your journey and progress.

Enjoy the journey, expect the hardships, prepare for failure, and most importantly, try again.

I’m only human, and if you see me in the street and say, “Hey, didn’t you tell me to do better in my life and you look like sh*t?”, Just remember that I am no saint, no God or angel, but I will tell it like it is. We all struggle, the best we can do is help each other on our journey to success.

There's no need to be perfect to inspire others. Let people get inspired by how you deal with your imperfections.

-Zaid K. Abdelnour (Economic Warfare: Secrets of Wealth Creation in the Age of Welfare Politics)(2)

Thank you guys so much for reading, be sure to check out my instagram, facebook and Tiktok @adultingwithstacs with updates on blog posts, polls, opinions, community comments, and more! Stay tuned and stay great everyone!

Sources: 1. Eyal, N. (n.d.). Get comfortable with being uncomfortable | psychology Today. Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/automatic-you/202209/get-comfortable-being-uncomfortable

2. Abdelnour, Z. K. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/1012085-there-s-no-need-to-be-perfect-to-inspire-others-let